Sunday, January 3, 2010

Mono Lessons (Part II: 25-50)

You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll thank God you don't have mono.



25. How to say NO without using the word “mono.”

26.
How to say NO with using the word “mono.” This one is harder.

27.
One of my leading love languages, when it comes to showing my love for others, is gift giving.

28.
I get offended when someone refuses a gift.

29.
How to utilize Facebook Text Message.

30.
I hold grudges. But not many.

31.
I can release grudges.

32.
Time FLIES!!!

33.
Power Ranger costumes are hotter than hell.

34.
I actually love my coworkers because they are my friends.

35.
I like herbal tea.

36.
Not ALL green tea tastes like hay. Just most green tea tastes like hay.

37.
I hate relationship labels.

38.
People don’t change. They think they’re changing for the “better,” but they’re only getting worse.

39.
Some people are complete and utter douche bags.

40.
It’s cathartic to tell a complete and utter douche bag that they’re a douche bag.

41.
I dated an amateur porn star. If you want to call it that, I guess. It’s not worth watching. Trust me.

42.
I really don’t care for high school flashbacks. Really.

43.
When you have mono, “it’s getting late” is said around 5pm.

44.
An unbelievable amount of mucus can reside in your sinus cavity.

45.
Allie is an undercover Tylenol sales representative. A rather pushy one.

46.
Normal cold medicines don’t have enough drug in one dose to actually do anything.

47.
Take 2+ doses of cold medicine to feel some relief or take larger amounts of separate, different drugs.

48.
Honesty is the best policy.

49.
There’s no reason to settle.

50.
Some hair dyes will stain your pillow.

Jason

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Facebook, "Follow" me at http://jasonhoggan.blogspot.com/.

2 comments:

  1. I especially like #28 and #36! Call and tell me more about, well, your Hate Thinky Poem.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha, very interesting top picks for this set of lessons. Did you enjoy that free verse hate poem? Haha. I needed to get all that off my chest via blog.

    ReplyDelete