Betrayal

I thought I understood betrayal;
deceit;
hypocrisy;
abandonment;
withdrawal;
fraud;
let-down.
Then I grew up.

Life betrayed me that day.

Life stopped going the way I always imagined it would. It's life's fault I feel this way, not mine.
Life took away my love.
Life took away my home.
Life took away my security.
Life took away my clarity.
Life took away my god.

How can I possibly trust again?
Men deceive,
business is fraudulent,
home abandons,
friends let down,
meds withdraw,
and religion is a hypocrite.
Life betrayed me.

How dare Life not Live up to my grandiose, pies-in-the-sky, rainbows-and-unicorns expectations? Pies make a mess when they fall from so high in the sky.

Betrayal has left me bitter and begging for a breath of blissfulness in which my brain can bathe.

I did this to myself. Does that mean I can fix it?

Unless

Things you should not, I said NOT, say to someone with an anxiety or major depressive disorder:

1. Man up.

2. Grow a pair.

3. It's in your head.

4. You just need more sun.

5. You're a hypochondriac.

6. Your emotions are so unpredictable. (No kidding - try being the one experiencing them.)

7. You're always sick.

8. Buck up.

9. Drama queen.

10. You're being a baby.

Unless you've experienced depression or anxiety so bad you've considered killing yourself;

Unless you've gone through the pain of getting on an antidepressant (or 5);

Unless you've experienced the numbness that feels like such a relief at first, but then turns into a yearning to feel again;

Unless you've tried to get off of an antidepressant and experienced true chemical dependence withdrawal;

Unless you've been unable to get out of bed for days because it hurts too much;

Unless your behavior has caused you to lose the people who were once closest to you;

Unless...

Then shut the fuck up and mind your own business.